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They Must Die

by Sudden Death

on Brain Dead (1995)

Marky Mark- (No talent sell-out punk.),
Mall Survey People- (See: "Do You
Piss in the Shower?"),
Catherine Blossom- (She is the person at Toad's in
New Haven who is responsible for booking acts.
When "Weird Al" Yankovic came there we contacted her
to try to get the gig opening for him. We were the
only group who wanted the gig. We were asking for
thirty minutes on stage, and told her we weren't
interested in getting paid. We just wanted to
perform. She didn't even have the professional
courtesy to call us back and say no. She just ignored
us and refused to return our calls. So on the night
of the show "Weird Al" played with no opening act)
Fab 5 Freddy- (He was one of the judges at a rap
contest I was in several years ago. I was easily the
crowd's favorite to win, but he voted for an 11-year-
old-Vanilla-Ice-lookalike-Bart-Simpson soundalike-
pudster named MC Loud. It's not the fact that I lost
that bothers me. It's that I lost to the worst of
all the contestants.)
Tipper Gore- (PMRC- The
Pre-Menstrual Recording Communists),
Wesley Crusher- (He just annoys me.),
Michael Jackson- (Ditto)
That Woman in the Sprint Ads- (Can you say...obnoxious?),
Macaulay Culkin- (I used to work in a video store.
You'd hate him too if you had to look at 400 pictures
of this little brat's face plastered all over the store.),
Rush Limbaugh- (I think Da Other Asiatics said it best:
"My rhymes are fat and stupid like Rush Limbaugh".)
Hollywood Artists- (Hollywood Artists Record Company.
They took my song "That's How I Like It" and totally
wrecked it. It has to be heard to be believed.
That whole incident was a scam. I'll spare you
the details. Never trust a record company that [as I
found out later] advertises in the National Enquirer.),
Barney- (the fat, fascist, purple pedophile
is single-handedly giving parody a bad name.)